i'd like to buy the world a coke

The weekend with Noah was great fun. I finally went to the Georgia Aquarium, and I'm considering getting a membership. It was fascinating, beautifully laid out and executed. Even the Beluga whales pooping in the tank seemed like it was some part of a larger master plan. It's also a great backdrop for photography, I'll put some up later on.

We also popped into the new World of Coke -- it was their opening weekend, and Cirque du Soleil was on hand to do acrobatics on the plaza. I'm not really sure what the tie-in was, but it was fun. You enter into a loft area that's crammed with artifacts and ads from the decades -- and our official welcomer pointed out two adverts from the late 20s that featured Joan Crawford, apparently unaware of the irony of it all.

The new museum features a lot of the same memorabilia as the old one, but also includes a working bottling line (which was broken on its second day, go figure) and a 3D short-feature that was short on plot but high on propaganda and contrived actors...and kinda spiffy effects. Finally, you wind up in the TasteIt lounge, with fountains set up for each of the continents (except Australia, conspicuously absent... Pepsi fans?). North Americans are so limited in their soda choice. You wind up with a free bottle of Coke to take home and an exit through an over-stuffed Coke store with every imaginable product tie-in possible. It was an enjoyable couple of hours but I still prefer the Guiness factory tour in Dublin -- nothing can beat the ice-cold Guiness in the roof lounge at the end of it all.

The Jazz Festival was this weekend. I live right by the park so it was enormous lines of traffic all around the neighborhood. Occasionally not knowing how to drive pays off.

And in arm news, it's been about six weeks since I was discharged from the hospital. Some of my faculties are coming back. I can make a tight fist again. My thumb extends a little further than it did a few weeks ago, and the searing pain has mostly subsided. It's still swollen and there's still a lot of stiffness, particularly in my wrist. My arm is a minefield of ingrown hairs thanks to the Dial soap I've had to use on the incision. On occasion, my fingers will get numb and tingly, but apparently this is normal. I've gotten used to being broken, so it's strange to feel like I can actually DO something (and also being fully aware that I can't). I'm going back to the surgeon on the 12th, more x-rays, and see where I stand.

Finally, it's Memorial Day. I can't bring myself to say "Happy Memorial Day!" because it kind of contradicts what Memorial Day is supposed to be. I have two military brothers, 1 former and 1 current, and I'm lucky they're still around. Regardless of your opinion of the current war, take a moment to reflect on those who have worked tirelessly to keep us safe (no matter how misguided the commanding officer may be).

indescribable

This guy has a whole series of videos on YouTube, and I don't really know what to say about this except....whoa, awesome.

milestones

1) This is post number fifty.

2) Apparently, earlier this month, I passed my 10,000th day on earth. Must remember to plan a party for 15,000.

constant craving

My childhood memories are pretty much swiss cheese -- full of holes. I can only remember teensy bits and pieces from before I was thirteen years old. Every once in a while, though, something will set me off and I'll remember something so vividly that I'd forgotten so long ago.

Today, I was scanning a message board I like to frequent, and one of the topics was when you can first tell a child will grow up to be a homosexual after observing her three year old niece develop a crush on a female friend of the family.

That question triggered this memory:

My mother had these enormous magenta and purple mu-mus with appliqué flowers that she used as a nightgown. I loved wearing them because a) they were so comfortable, and b) when I spun around the dress spread out around me, and I thought I looked like k.d. lang in one of her music videos where she did the same thing.

I also thought k.d. lang was a boy at the time.

But, now, in retrospect, a little boy who loves k.d. lang music videos... yeah, that's probably a very clear indication you'll grow up homo.

Despite what the religious right desperately asserts, sexuality is completely by nature, not nurture. My parents raised five straighties ahead of me and I somehow don't think they accidentally bred me as an aberration. Nor is it a choice; as I explained to my father at one point, why would I wake up one morning and actively decide to be a social pariah?

In this political season, I wish that people would realize this. I once explained to my very conservative brother that though I may share some similar points of view with the conservative line of thought, I can never, ever, ever cast a vote for someone who views me as less deserving of a right or a privilege because of something I have no control over. Ron Paul's performance at the Republican debates last week was eye-opening, but a look back on his congressional record concerning gay issues is moreso, and puts him quite at odds with the man he wants everyone to think he is.

payday

Ahh, fiscal comfort once again. I had a nice surprise in there too, a retroactive raise from the performance reviews earlier in the year. It's not a big shift but 5 months worth of minuscule back pay adds up. The actual raise (knock wood) should kick in next pay period.

I've opened my account with SunTrust and I'm keeping it simple for the time being. Bank of America is still open right now, but that's only because my change in direct deposit hasn't taken effect yet. Once it does, I'm outta there.

Yesterday was a nice day. With my unexpected windfall, I treated myself to a manicure (I haven't been able to bite my nails with my new teeth and they've gotten quite long) and bought my roommate some concert tickets he's been salivating over as a thanks for everything he's done for me. Some of my sub-dermal stitches had come to the surface, so I needed to go to the doctor to get them removed. Between that and the manicure, my arm had been manhandled by the end of the day and oh, I was feeling it.

Everything in the condo is on the fritz right now. The AC needs a new compressor (luckily it has only topped out at 75 degrees the past few days)... the jacuzzi tub wouldn't jacuzz. DirecTV isn't picking up the signal anymore. Roommate was smart to get a home warranty when he bought the place and now we're jacuzzing happily and the new compressor is on its way. DirecTV? Well, that's not so simple. We have to cut down a tree. It has grown in the past year and now completely blocks the dish. I've been trying to convince roommate that cable is a much more viable (and less expensive) option, but so far, to no avail.

And Noah is here on Thursday! So excited!

Things have calmed down considerably and I'm beginning to have that free-spirited fun at work again. It's a weird state of being right now, I'm bouncing around and enjoying myself, but at the same time I'm still on the occasional painkiller, which makes me depressive. I'll use up all my happy at work and by the time I get home I'm gloomy as anything.

I got some unexpected face time with a very higher up today... she was formerly the NYC veep, now she's the national director of training and staff development. She's one of those people who says something and it gets done with no questions asked. She's been around long enough that everyone knows she knows exactly what she's saying. It started out with her asking about what happened to my arm, then about what the heck I was doing in Atlanta, and it went from there. I recounted my history with the company, and she listened intently. I mentioned applying for the software trainer position and emphasized my background in corporate training.

Her parting words to me: "I'll be thinking about you!"

Guess I said the right stuff, huh?

good news

Noah's coming to visit next weekend! Hooray!

defensive

Don't worry, I'm not quitting my job yet. My major concern was that my higher-ups weren't going to take appropriate action -- I've seen it happen before on lesser problems. But, I've been taking statements from witnesses to get our attacker removed permanently, and though it isn't official yet, he's been told by the company vice president to stay away. So far, he has.

He's a long time member who's actually been pretty nice, though you could always tell when he'd fallen off the wagon. His eyes would change, his normally carefree attitude dissipated. I don't know him well enough but I've been told it's coke and heroin. Chances are he probably doesn't even remember why he's being kicked out.

This whole experience (and the testimonials from family) has made me think its time to get back into some self defense / martial arts courses. Had I not been injured I would have been able to diffuse a physical situation effectively, but a brush up is not a bad idea. Finding one that will mesh into my schedule might be difficult though.

--

And in completely unrelated un-news... I have always been a complete klutz. Whether it's crashing my bike or falling over for no apparent reason or tripping over the perfectly smooth floor... almost daily there's some event that reinforces the notion that I have little to no control over my extremities. My equilibrium is always just a little bit off.

Yesterday, talking to a co-worker, a possible reason dawned on me -- see, for the first three years of my life I was deaf. I had fluid in my ears that blocked the passage of sound. The fluid was drained and I hear fine, but the next 12 years or so were a parade of constant ear infections.

So, MAYBE I'm not just uncoordinated. Maybe there's actually a feasible scientific explanation. And it only took me 25 years to figure that out.

passed

When Joan Crawford died, Bette Davis basically treated it as an event worthy of celebration. One of her friends stopped her and said "You know, when someone dies, you're only supposed to speak good of them."

Bette's inimitable response: "Joan Crawford is dead. Good."

Now, I'm generally a respectful person, but today's news of Jerry Falwell's death is tempting my inner Bette Davis to come out. He was a vile, hateful man in life and deserves to be remembered as such.

its funny because its true

I've recently regained a huge love for the comics page after discovering Josh Fruhlinger's Comics Curmudgeon. Heart of the City has a very relevant storyline right now.



I love it. Two days of painkiller jokes. "SPONGEBOB!" in the 4th strip is hilarious to me -- watching Spongebob was, at times, the only way I kept my sanity in the hospital. The third strip reminds me of everyone else I know -- "Dang, its too bad that story's not more interesting."

time to go

Last night I was physically threatened at my place of work by a guy who was completely strung out on drugs.

Me. The dude with a broken arm. He had his fists cocked and ready when someone else intervened.

I don't get paid enough for this. What else is out there, I wonder...

photographic evidence

Before anything ever happened, I had nearly perfect teeth. Just a very slight overbite, but everything very even and straight. If you look closely at the left tooth you'll see just a teensy bit of chipping that has happened over the years, but nothing major.

Then the accident. Left me with a very large space between uppers and lowers, and, if you look closely, knocked the top and bottom just slightly out of alignment.



And here we are today. Porcelain crowns, and reshaped bottom teeth. (will get higher-resolution pictures up soon, as well as shots of the crooked plastic caps) They are a different shape from my previous teeth and now I have no noticeable overbite. I'm not used to them yet, but I'm pleased. The lips cover up the very top by the gums, where they've been pushed back. It almost looks like there's decay up there, but really, its just empty space where the gums haven't healed yet.

And since I'm sharing, here's a look at the scars from the surgery. Don't worry, they're not too graphic.

The inside part of the arm. This incision was about six inches long. The dots on either side of the line are where the staples were placed. Supposedly those will fade with time.

And this is the outside of the arm. This incision is about seven inches, and that circle there indicates where the bone punctured the skin (sorry for the mental image)

And, finally, this is a side by side of my arms -- the angle is a little deceptive, but you can get an idea of how much muscle I've lost. I am healing and make a little progress every day, but I'm still very weak and stiff. I tried to turn a doorknob earlier today and couldn't. There's possibility of nerve damage with my thumb but it's still too early to tell. I am particularly glad I wasn't working at a restaurant when this happened, though going on disability for a few weeks would have been a nice, if ultimately inconvenient, break.

I am so ridiculously in the mood for pizza right now, but I made my first payment on my new teeth and don't get paid again till Friday.

Guess it'll have to wait.

tiny victories

I got my new teeth!

I went to the dentist's office, about ready to rip out my plastic temporaries myself. They were just slightly crooked and felt terribly unnatural in my mouth. And the dental assist tried to yank 'em too, but the cement proved to bonding to wiggle them out without excruciating pain, so she called Dr. Wingfield in to assist and to numb me up.

Dr. Wingfield is my fabulous gay dentist. He's a talented dentist, and just a bit effeminate. Not over the top, although his first comment when he walked in the room, fists full of novacaine needles, was:

"Oh, my god! I love your shoes!"

Anyway, four painful injections of numbing agents later, he took some blunt object and tapped out my teeth. He checked the coloring of the new teeth against the naturals, which he'd special ordered a shade lighter than mine. His gaydar was as good as mine, he knew that somewhere down the road I would take the step of a bleaching process, and wanted everything to match.

Only a scant 38 minutes later, I left the building with my new teeth glued to my head. They feel natural and look great, except where they had to push the gums back. I've got a few months of healing on these -- basically, by the time I've paid for them, I'll be all healed up.

I promptly went out for a burrito to celebrate regaining the ability to bite and chew... FGD said solid foods were a-okay. Alas, I was still a little swollen, and it hurt. But it still tasted so, so, so good...

effective monday...

...I will *officially* be the assistant general manager at my job. It's an open secret, everyone already knows, and I've been doing the job already... but it is made official on Monday. A substantial pay raise is also in the works. The timing could NOT be more perfect. With all the dental bills and such I'm paying for over the next few months, it won't feel like I've gotten a raise, but I'll at least be able to sustain.

My arm has been hurting a lot since I got the staples out, and now I'm having a lot of pain in my thumb and wrist joints that wasn't there before. I'm certain that's because my bandages have been a lot looser so they're having to support themselves more than before. Still, I haven't laid off the new pain killers yet because it's terribly uncomfortable without them. Two to three more months of being a one-armed wonder. Hoping for at least a short vacation in June, but we'll have to see how I'm feeling.

loopy

Wow, my new painkiller prescription is potent. I'm about twenty feet off the ground right now.

convalescence continues

Went for my surgeon followup today, and also got to take a peek at my x-rays. 2 fractures, one on each bone. You can also see where the bone punctured the skin, which will leave a lovely scar.

The good news is that everything is in alignment -- provided that stays in place, I should make a full recovery without massive limitations on my range of motion (though it will never be back to where it once was, natch). I have about three months of convalescence left, which means I can't use my left arm for anything beyond typing or holding anything that would weigh more than a coffee cup. The doctor also strongly warned me against getting back on the bike any time soon -- any weight on the arm can cause it to fracture again and possibly break the plates as well.

I got a new prescription for pain killers, so I should be doing much better this time next week. I think I finally shook the upper respiratory infection, too.

Its not over, but the deepest part of the woods seems to be behind me now...